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...A few more poems from "You Just
Gotta Laugh..."
THE BOOBY TRAP
This morning I grabbed my "watering can",
An empty detergent bottle
Near the washer and drier
Then watered my two
wandering Jew plants nearby--
One eighteen inches off the floor
And the other above me
Totally oblivious
Something was wrong here.
But when I watered my monster ivy plant
Which has taken over most of the large backroom
window
I noticed detergent
was pouring out of my plastic container.
Oh my God
I am going to kill this plant
(to say nothing of the two wandering Jew plants
that weren't
doing good anyway)
They
never do well when brought
In the house after the summer is over.
Frantically and desperately
I tipped over the gigantic
pot.
It took superman powers.
The pot weighed over fifty pounds!
And dumped as much
as the
Gooey, thick liquid
I could on the wooden floor.
I then poured water
On all three plants
Trying to flush out
The detergent
Creating
a large rectangular pool of water
Five
foot by a foot and half
And
it took more than
An hour
To first mop up the detergent,
Then rinse the floor with water
And then dry it
Which really was impossible
To do completely.
By now, I was absolutely fuming
I planned to tell my “other” off
When she got up
When she got up,
I
immediately, loudly lit into her,
"Why
did you place your detergent
On
the floor? Don't you know I keep my
'Watering can' also on the floor? You booby trapped me!"
I quickly explained to her
What had happened.
It was my turn to be embarrassed:
She replied,
"You
placed the detergent there
When
you bought it last week.”
“You
are careless!”
I bristled
being called that
For the umpteenth
time.
I did note the detergent
I watered my plants with
Had no dye or perfume in it.
Maybe my plants will still survive
This unfortunate bath.
I swore for now on
I would keep my watering can
In the exact spot on the floor every time.
I created a big mess.
I hate cleaning.
I
do like keeping my plants alive. Siggy
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